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The Male - Female Dictionary


THINGY
Female: Any part under a car's hood.
Male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.


VULNERABLE
Female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male: Playing football without a helmet.


COMMUNICATION
Female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings.
Male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off with the kids.


BUTT
Female: What every item of clothing manufactured makes ''look bigger.''
Male: What you slap when someone's scored a touchdown,
homerun, or goal. Also good for mooning.

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ENTERTAINMENT
Female: A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male: Anything that can be done while drinking.


COMMITMENT
Female: A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.


FLATULENCE
Female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion.
Male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding.


MAKING LOVE
Female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.

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REMOTE CONTROL
Female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every three minutes.