05-06-2004, 02:02 AM
Benefits of Being a Woman
* We got off the Titanic first.
* We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
* We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
* We can cry and get off speeding fines.
* We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.
* Taxis stop for us.
* We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
* Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies (you get the point).
* New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
* No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.
* We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
* If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
* We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her butt.
* We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
* If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
* We have the ability to dress ourselves.
* We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
* If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
* There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
* We'll never regret piercing our ears.
* We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
* We'll never discover we've been duped by a Wonderbra.
* We got off the Titanic first.
* We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
* We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
* We can cry and get off speeding fines.
* We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.
* Taxis stop for us.
* We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
* Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies (you get the point).
* New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
* No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.
* We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
* If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
* We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her butt.
* We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
* If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
* We have the ability to dress ourselves.
* We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
* If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
* There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
* We'll never regret piercing our ears.
* We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
* We'll never discover we've been duped by a Wonderbra.
