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Writers strike jokes...
#1

A priest and an animal of some kind go into a bar. The bartender says something to the effect that an animal in a bar is a somewhat unusual occurrence, and then the animal says something funny.

A guy goes into a whorehouse and asks what he can get for 20 bucks. The madam refers to some sexual practice, takes his $20 and sends him into a back room where something happens that is not sexual but takes the guy by surprise, as it dawns on him that what the madam said had a double meaning, implying that he was cheap.

A street bum asks a passing businessman for some help. The businessman gives him advice instead of money. The bum makes a derogatory, profanity-laced comment.

A large-breasted woman goes into a bar and orders a drink with an unusual name. The bartender makes a pithy remark, involving some wordplay based on the similarity between the name of the drink and her large breasts.


Two old guys sit on a bench in Central Park, when a very attractive young woman walks by, causing them to reminisce about their younger days when they might have had an appropriate anatomical reaction.

An old man and an old woman who have been married 50 years have sex on their anniversary and when he asks why they haven't done this more often, she makes a remark suggesting that she has, but with one of his relatives.

Two Jews walk into a bar.
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#2

Anhil8tor Wrote:A priest and an animal of some kind go into a bar. The bartender says something to the effect that an animal in a bar is a somewhat unusual occurrence, and then the animal says something funny.

A guy goes into a whorehouse and asks what he can get for 20 bucks. The madam refers to some sexual practice, takes his $20 and sends him into a back room where something happens that is not sexual but takes the guy by surprise, as it dawns on him that what the madam said had a double meaning, implying that he was cheap.

A street bum asks a passing businessman for some help. The businessman gives him advice instead of money. The bum makes a derogatory, profanity-laced comment.

A large-breasted woman goes into a bar and orders a drink with an unusual name. The bartender makes a pithy remark, involving some wordplay based on the similarity between the name of the drink and her large breasts.


Two old guys sit on a bench in Central Park, when a very attractive young woman walks by, causing them to reminisce about their younger days when they might have had an appropriate anatomical reaction.

An old man and an old woman who have been married 50 years have sex on their anniversary and when he asks why they haven't done this more often, she makes a remark suggesting that she has, but with one of his relatives.

Two Jews walk into a bar.
I don't know what that means.
Ha, ha, very funny!I know a guy who goes into a whorehouse and asks what he can get for 20 bucks.
I have never heard about
The madam refers to some sexual practise takes his $20 and sends him into a back room where something happens that is not sexual but takes the guy by surprise as it dawns on him that what the madam said had a double meaning implying that I was cheap

. What is giant sand?

I hear you.
Thanks for the info. How old are you?
Ha, ha, very funny!As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two."More than
100
years?As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two."

Who said I had to make sense ?
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#3

sassy for guild leadin' 08!
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