[Anhil8tor]

There are still some old school brothers that won't touch it... but hey you can't make eryone conform....

surely you eat pussy right bird?

[BIRD33]

Surely I won't be sharing that information with some weird internet dude.It moves from here to asking for pictures of me in the act.No thanks.

I spent saturday night standing in 2 feet of water covered in gas trying to plug in a generator for some broads sump pump.Typical saturday for me.

[BIRD33]

This video should be titled "white people problems".Waahh my bridge washed away.

[video=youtube;WyO18one8fU]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WyO18one8fU&feature=player_embedded[/video]

[WoolyGoat]

[BIRD33]

In case there is some confusion on what whistles do skip to the 45 second mark so Bubb Rubb can clear that up for you.

[video=youtube;x_JtoW7GrdY]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_JtoW7GrdY&feature=player_embedded#![/video]

[BIRD33]

I forgot to mention that last week when I was playing the nice guy helping that broad out with her sump pump I went to get gas for the generator during the middle of the hurricane.So this is after I take my life in my own hands for the good of others by plugging shit in standing in two feet of water during a sideways rain.So I get to the gas station and am soaked to the bone and can barely see with the rain and the wind.I go inside the station which is a ocean of calm(literary device, yo) compared to outside.I say "give me 40 on that pump right there" and point to my car which is no less than 35 feet away from the window.The fat fuck behind the counter doesnt even look outside and says "you know I hate it when people don't know the pump numbers and you need to go outside and figure out which one it is".I point to my car but he refuses to look."You're having you're own little natural disaster in here arent you" I say and ask him why he's being an asshole.He tells me I can't talk to him like that.I pick up the tray of lighters on the counter and throw them across the floor."How fast do you think the cops will respond to a disturbance tonight?" I ask knowing that the cops are a little tied up with a historic storm.He looks out the window and goes "Pump 5?Red car?".I tell him yes and thank you.

Turns out the cops were never going to respond.During the hurricane some nut went to his daughters house in virginia, killed his ex-wife,her boyfriend and the boyfriends son then drove 3 hours with his kid to about half a mile from the gas station where I was at pretty much at the same time I was there and broke into his mother in laws house and killed her.He drives his kid to the hospital around the corner from me and hands her to a nurse who then calls the cops because he had a gun.They find his car 2 miles down the road and when they approach it he shoots at them from behind a building he was hiding by.They find him two hours later with a self inflicted gun shot to the head.

[Anhil8tor]

that mother fucker bird is hard core.

[BIRD33]

Like you have no idea.

I've golfed Tuesday, Yesterday and I'm leaving at noon to play today.Coming out of a swing funk.Tuesday I'm 135 out on a par 3.I almost split the flag stick in half.

[WoolyGoat]

BIRD33 is hard core like whooooop whhooooooOOOOOOOOOOOP!

[who]

live and learn

[BIRD33]

I'm available for mentoring.

[BIRD33]

[ATTACH=CONFIG]11467[/ATTACH]

I have a new favorite website which takes the lead from the one where the guy would go around and take funny pictures of himself next to road side memorials for car accidents.

http://whitewhine.com/

[ATTACH=CONFIG]11468[/ATTACH]

Its like all of anil8tors posts wrapped up into one website.

[BIRD33]

Skip to the 4 minute mark.Glad he's given a gun by the state.Real smart.

[video=youtube;x7Kw9-vTJYs]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7Kw9-vTJYs&feature=player_embedded[/video]

[BIRD33]

[ATTACH=CONFIG]11469[/ATTACH]

http://www.happyplace.com/4286/brilliant...ning-signs

[BIRD33]

24 year old moves in next door to me last week.I meet her last night.Hmmmm.

[WoolyGoat]

teh spork would've fucked her already

[BIRD33]

This is actually happening so I don't see how spork applies.

You don't deserve it but 8 hours later you're getting an update.Coming home drunk from watching the game I notice when I open my door the 24 year old quickly opens her door and comes out to smoke a cigarette.Hello.So I go outside to get something "from my car" after smoking a bowl and literally throw out the lamest line of "So are you a big football fan?"I quickly follow up with a furious series of questions about how she is and how the move is going and what fucking high school she went to.You may be asking why is she listening to this?Kids looking good.So its kind of going so well that I contemplate asking her if she smokes weed which because if she says yes at that point its a done deal.Penis in mouth.I hold back and bid her adieu.Learn from this.

[BIRD33]

"I apologise to anyone who bought my on-sale ebook of Baby, I'm Yours and read on pg 293: 'He stiffened for a moment but then she felt his muscles loosen as he shitted on the ground'," says Andersen. "Shifted - he SHIFTED! I just cringe when I think of the readers who have read this. Hopefully, it's only in the iBook version that I bought, but if it's in yours as well, please let me know. I've contacted the editor and pray this will be promptly fixed.


http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/booksblo...n-andersen

[WoolyGoat]

damnyouautocorrect!

[BIRD33]

Links at noon.82ish.