08-23-2004, 10:51 PM
A man goes to see his doctor because he has an incredibly small penis
and wants to know if anything can be done to help him.
The doctor rolls his eyes and says, "Okay, let's have a look."
The guy drops his pants and the doctor tries not to laugh and says,
"You're right! You definitely need help! But you're in luck because we have
a new procedure now that uses tissue taken from the trunk of a newborn baby
elephant. It doesn't hurt you and doesn't hurt the elephant, so everybody
wins."
The guy says, "Sign me up!"
So he checks into the hospital and has the operation. After
convalescing for a while, he gets the courage to ask a girl out on a date.
They're having dinner at a nice restaurant, when suddenly his penis
rips through his pants, snakes up over the edge of the table, grabs a
biscuit, and disappears back under the table. The guy doesn't know what to
think, and the girl's eyes are as big as quarters.
"Can you do that again?" she asks.
The guy gasps and says, "I think so, but I don't think my ass can take
another biscuit!"
and wants to know if anything can be done to help him.
The doctor rolls his eyes and says, "Okay, let's have a look."
The guy drops his pants and the doctor tries not to laugh and says,
"You're right! You definitely need help! But you're in luck because we have
a new procedure now that uses tissue taken from the trunk of a newborn baby
elephant. It doesn't hurt you and doesn't hurt the elephant, so everybody
wins."
The guy says, "Sign me up!"
So he checks into the hospital and has the operation. After
convalescing for a while, he gets the courage to ask a girl out on a date.
They're having dinner at a nice restaurant, when suddenly his penis
rips through his pants, snakes up over the edge of the table, grabs a
biscuit, and disappears back under the table. The guy doesn't know what to
think, and the girl's eyes are as big as quarters.
"Can you do that again?" she asks.
The guy gasps and says, "I think so, but I don't think my ass can take
another biscuit!"
I realise that I have a past to break with--an accumulation of inertia, wrong, foolishness, rot, junk. A great need of clarification, of mindfulness, or rather, of no mind. A need to return to genuine practice, right effort. Need to push on the great doubt. Need for the spirit. Hang on to the clear light.
Thomas Merton
