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I Bought A Mountain Bike
#1

Went for a 1 1/2 hour ride on Wednesday and Thursday. Now my taint hurts something fierce.
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#2

TomFoolery Wrote:Went for a 1 1/2 hour ride on Wednesday and Thursday. Now my taint hurts something fierce.

dude, i'm pretty sure that small padded thing goes over the metal bar you ass humped for an hr and a half.
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#3

Cameltoe280 Wrote:dude, i'm pretty sure that small padded thing goes over the metal bar you ass humped for an hr and a half.

I should have started this thread on Wednesday.
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#4

The bike has a quick release seat. I should take the seat off, rub some poo on the locking mechanism, and take it back to the store.

"I'd like to return this bike. The seat isn't very comfortable."
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#5

throw some unrolled gauze up your ass with a 2 foot section hanging out so if salesdude gives you a hassle, drop your shorts exhibiting said gauze and simply say "no where in the instructions does it mention proper use of this padded thing."
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#6

This is doable.

If I decide to try this I'll make sure to cut a circular hole in my shorts right by the turd cutter to make it more believeable.
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#7

Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?
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#8

yellowdog Wrote:Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?

my guess is a SledgeHammer...SWEET!

I'll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours
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#9

yellowdog Wrote:Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?

I will not be buying bike shorts with pads.

The bike I wanted to get is a Trek Alpha SL, but I didn't have enough 'points' to get it for free from Symantec. I ended up splurging ( :roll: ) on a Mongoose, I'm not sure of the model.
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#10

They make baggy padded shorts these days. Look like regular shorts.

I used to have a couple of Mongoose BMX bikes. I liked them.
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#11

I have a Diamondback Mountain bike and a Diamondback BMX before they stopped making them. They kick ass.

I'll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours
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#12

I'm rollin Specialized M4 old skool 8 speed and a Haro BMX from circa 1985.

Yeah.

Jimmy - The old Hardcore Standard. :clap:
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#13

Jimmy Wrote:I'm rollin Specialized M4 old skool 8 speed and a Haro BMX from circa 1985.

Yeah.

damn, you're pretty cool for an internet pussy

I'll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours
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#14

I was under the impression I was an internet bad-ass.

Jimmy - The old Hardcore Standard. :clap:
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#15

yellowdog Wrote:Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?

[Image: training_wheels.jpg]




















BRING BACK IMG TAGS DAMNIT

[Image: line.gif]
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#16

l to r: bike, Tom's Dad, Tom
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#17

Do you ever take it off any sweet jumps?

[Image: porngood.jpg]
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