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I Bought A Mountain Bike - Printable Version

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I Bought A Mountain Bike - TomFoolery - 06-03-2005

Went for a 1 1/2 hour ride on Wednesday and Thursday. Now my taint hurts something fierce.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - CT280 - 06-03-2005

TomFoolery Wrote:Went for a 1 1/2 hour ride on Wednesday and Thursday. Now my taint hurts something fierce.

dude, i'm pretty sure that small padded thing goes over the metal bar you ass humped for an hr and a half.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - TomFoolery - 06-03-2005

Cameltoe280 Wrote:dude, i'm pretty sure that small padded thing goes over the metal bar you ass humped for an hr and a half.

I should have started this thread on Wednesday.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - TomFoolery - 06-03-2005

The bike has a quick release seat. I should take the seat off, rub some poo on the locking mechanism, and take it back to the store.

"I'd like to return this bike. The seat isn't very comfortable."

I Bought A Mountain Bike - CT280 - 06-03-2005

throw some unrolled gauze up your ass with a 2 foot section hanging out so if salesdude gives you a hassle, drop your shorts exhibiting said gauze and simply say "no where in the instructions does it mention proper use of this padded thing."

I Bought A Mountain Bike - TomFoolery - 06-03-2005

This is doable.

If I decide to try this I'll make sure to cut a circular hole in my shorts right by the turd cutter to make it more believeable.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - yellowdog - 06-03-2005

Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?

I Bought A Mountain Bike - cLaY - 06-03-2005

yellowdog Wrote:Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?

my guess is a SledgeHammer...SWEET!

I Bought A Mountain Bike - TomFoolery - 06-03-2005

yellowdog Wrote:Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?

I will not be buying bike shorts with pads.

The bike I wanted to get is a Trek Alpha SL, but I didn't have enough 'points' to get it for free from Symantec. I ended up splurging ( :roll: ) on a Mongoose, I'm not sure of the model.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - yellowdog - 06-03-2005

They make baggy padded shorts these days. Look like regular shorts.

I used to have a couple of Mongoose BMX bikes. I liked them.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - cLaY - 06-03-2005

I have a Diamondback Mountain bike and a Diamondback BMX before they stopped making them. They kick ass.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - Jimmy - 06-03-2005

I'm rollin Specialized M4 old skool 8 speed and a Haro BMX from circa 1985.

Yeah.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - cLaY - 06-03-2005

Jimmy Wrote:I'm rollin Specialized M4 old skool 8 speed and a Haro BMX from circa 1985.

Yeah.

damn, you're pretty cool for an internet pussy

I Bought A Mountain Bike - Jimmy - 06-03-2005

I was under the impression I was an internet bad-ass.

I Bought A Mountain Bike - asshat - 06-03-2005

yellowdog Wrote:Buy some bike shorts with pads.

You'll toughen up your bridge in no time, though. I could take a sledgehammer shot to the taint these days and it not hurt, but I think I'm sterile. Not that it matters, I couldn't get laid in a morgue.

What kind of a bike?

[Image: training_wheels.jpg]




















BRING BACK IMG TAGS DAMNIT

I Bought A Mountain Bike - TomFoolery - 06-03-2005

l to r: bike, Tom's Dad, Tom

I Bought A Mountain Bike - Jdub - 06-03-2005

Do you ever take it off any sweet jumps?