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Masturbation on the Morrison Bridge
#1

The alleged incident involving 47-year-old Michael Wade Tyner of Southeast Portland happened on Aug. 21 at 8:50 am, when a witness told police they'd spotted a naked man with a blow-up doll on a pedestrian walkway at the east end of the Morrison Bridge, in full view of pedestrians on the bridge.

You can read the whole police report here [PDF]. Here are the highlights, from Officer Thomas Larson's report:

"While I was waiting for cover I could see [Tyner] put lubrication on his semi-flaccid penis and then start to massage it in a rapid motion with his hand in a fist. He then picked up a rubber device and inserted his now erect penis in this rubber device and began to stroke the rubber device rapidly back and forth over his penis. He momentarily stopped and picked up a magazine and propped it on the pedestrian guardrail edge so he could better view it. He then disengaged the rubber device and began to kneel down and insert his penis in the pseudo vagina of the blow-up doll. He began to gyrate his hips back and forth while his erect penis was going in and out of the blow-up doll...I then seized the blow-up doll, the packaged carton for the blow-up doll labeled as "Lindsay Fully Loaded Love Doll," a personal rubber masturbation device and a pornographic magazine. The magazine was open to the nude picture of a female. As I attempted to deflate the blow-up doll, I could see that all three of the pseudo orifices of the doll had lubrication on them by the shiny, greasy sheen on them. I then took them to the Central Precinct property room and placed them in a locker as evidence."

Tyner was charged with public indecency, indecent exposure and disorderly conduct in Multnomah County Circuit Court. He failed to appear for his Sept. 4 arraignment and is now wanted on a warrant.


No charges were filed against Lindsay.
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#2

I think it was important that the cop detailed that his penis was erect.

Insert clever, witty and amusing signature here.
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#3

Is it just me or did that cop take notes a little to closely?My report would have been :I saw a guy take his penis out and started having sex with a blow up doll, the end.



I once saw a guy jerking off while standing in the woods looking at traffic on the Jersey turnpike.

See You In Toledo
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#4

BIRD33 Wrote:Is it just me or did that cop take notes a little to closely?My report would have been :I saw a guy take his penis out and started having sex with a blow up doll, the end.



I once saw a guy jerking off while standing in the woods looking at traffic on the Jersey turnpike.

Did you take note of how erect his penis was?

Insert clever, witty and amusing signature here.
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#5

Cucumber Wrote:I think it was important that the cop detailed that his penis was erect.

Yes, at one point it was erect and another point semi-flaccid. His attention to detail is impeccable.
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#6

Cucumber Wrote:Did you take note of how erect his penis was?

unfortunately I did.It was rock hard and he had a goofy grin on his face.I'll never forget it.

See You In Toledo
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#7

Is your AV related?

Shoot Straight . . . Conserve Ammo . . . And Never Ever Cut A Deal With A Dragon
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