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Ever do mean shit to people?
#1

Vit E can be a total prick. I bumped into this chick from my home town last weekend. She had no heartburn telling me she's still pissed about what I did to her friend back in '89. ('bode!) I was out with some of my buddys tossin' back some brews at the local bar and grill. This chick walks in..kinda fine. She was a bigger girl in high school but had stepped her game up and dropped 25-40 lbs. Her steaks were still a little marbled but, let's face it we've all plowed bigger. So we start gabbin'. Eventually she says how mean I was too her when she was fat and said there's no way she'd ever date me now. I kinda felt bad (or at least I tried to act like it). 'bout an hour or so pass and she appologized for saying I was mean. Then her and her friends' favorite song plays all they to run up on the dance floor. Leaving me and my buddys with all of their purses. Stupid ho's! So I open her shit to see what she's got in there. Typical stuff, nothing worth mentioning 'cept this crazy long string of keychains. I thought it would be funny to take every key and dangly shit off of all the rings. The song ends and thier is a pile of keys, bart simpsons, smurfs and what nots in the middle of the table. Instead of returning to the table they scurry off to the bathroom. Now all of the guys start dumping purses on the table, taking out every card from the wallets, opening every tampon, uncapping all of the make up into one huge heap. Figuring nothing good is gonna come of this we get up and leave.

Out at the car, we're about to jump in and she comes running out of the bar in hysteria screaming stuff like 'why did I even think you were worth talking to' 'I thought you liked me' and stuff. I just said shut up cow and drove off while she sobbed uncontrollably on the curb.

I forgot how fukking fun that night was.
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#2

That's great! The only way that story would have been better is if you got a hummer before dumping the purses.

ntype Wrote:unrack me it's another false friend. mmh you were "readjusted" but I suppose that google translation is another source of bizzareness in one of my posts.

I fear that.
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#3

Shadrach Wrote:That's great! The only way that story would have been better is if you got a hummer before dumping the purses.

I had to skip that part. I didn't think Tom would have been able to follow the story with that in there.
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#4

i'll comment later, but RACK this story

I'll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours
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#5

:lool:
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#6

If any guy dumped out my purse's contents I'd fucking claw his eyes out.
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#7

I do mean shit to people too....I continue to post here everyday.
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#8

Vitamin E Wrote:Vit E can be a total prick. I bumped into this chick from my home town last weekend. She had no heartburn telling me she's still pissed about what I did to her friend back in '89. ('bode!) I was out with some of my buddys tossin' back some brews at the local bar and grill. This chick walks in..kinda fine. She was a bigger girl in high school but had stepped her game up and dropped 25-40 lbs. Her steaks were still a little marbled but, let's face it we've all plowed bigger. So we start gabbin'. Eventually she says how mean I was too her when she was fat and said there's no way she'd ever date me now. I kinda felt bad (or at least I tried to act like it). 'bout an hour or so pass and she appologized for saying I was mean. Then her and her friends' favorite song plays all they to run up on the dance floor. Leaving me and my buddys with all of their purses. Stupid ho's! So I open her shit to see what she's got in there. Typical stuff, nothing worth mentioning 'cept this crazy long string of keychains. I thought it would be funny to take every key and dangly shit off of all the rings. The song ends and thier is a pile of keys, bart simpsons, smurfs and what nots in the middle of the table. Instead of returning to the table they scurry off to the bathroom. Now all of the guys start dumping purses on the table, taking out every card from the wallets, opening every tampon, uncapping all of the make up into one huge heap. Figuring nothing good is gonna come of this we get up and leave.

Out at the car, we're about to jump in and she comes running out of the bar in hysteria screaming stuff like 'why did I even think you were worth talking to' 'I thought you liked me' and stuff. I just said shut up cow and drove off while she sobbed uncontrollably on the curb.

I forgot how fukking fun that night was.
-10 manpoints for examining contents of a purse.

Son, I am Disappoint.
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#9

mmh well dunno doesn't seem really nice to do that to someone...I mean really.

anyhow that post will be ignored as usual
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#10

I am not a mean person.. but clay just busted a nut on louisiana.
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#11

Anhil8tor Wrote:I am not a mean person.. but clay just busted a nut on louisiana.

I hear Louisiana took it on the chin like a p0rn star.
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#12

I fucked a chick in the ass dry, does that count?

[Image: porngood.jpg]
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#13

BUY MY BOOK MOTHERBITCHES. My stories kill this clown.

-Spork

Pre-order my book. I've written a bunch of material and we're currently shopping around for a publisher.

[Image: attachment.php?attachmentid=9892&stc=1]

-SPorK
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#14

the only way this could have been a better story is if you mushroom slapped her before you drove off.
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