08-12-2005, 07:45 PM
How many people here think this is my first date?
BIRD33 Wrote:Im guessing BEW's vag loks like a hotdog that exploded in the microwave.
I've Got A Date Next Weekend
08-12-2005, 07:47 PM
TomFoolery Wrote:If SanDog were here he woulda racked my comment. I'm sick of you fuckers not recognizing my $$$ movie quotes.
yea, i fuckin' got it...you'll never score/get another date that way.
08-12-2005, 08:33 PM
Blueeyedwoman Wrote:Good stuff here.
for those who did not understand vapid, see above
I realise that I have a past to break with--an accumulation of inertia, wrong, foolishness, rot, junk. A great need of clarification, of mindfulness, or rather, of no mind. A need to return to genuine practice, right effort. Need to push on the great doubt. Need for the spirit. Hang on to the clear light.
Thomas Merton
08-12-2005, 09:02 PM
How did you meet her?
fem Wrote:Now I'm just stupid.
fem Wrote:I enjoy being a dumb cunt. Thanks.
TomFoolery Wrote:You hurt me so bad, but I just can't stop loving you.
08-12-2005, 09:21 PM
paybacksare Wrote:How did you meet her?
She works at the Subway restaurant across the street from the office. She gave me extra turkey on my sub one day and that's how I knew she wanted me.
BIRD33 Wrote:Im guessing BEW's vag loks like a hotdog that exploded in the microwave.
08-12-2005, 09:22 PM
TomFoolery Wrote:How many people here think this is my first date?
From the sound of it...everyone.
My advice...plenty-o-alcohol. Works everytime.
08-12-2005, 09:45 PM
TomFoolery Wrote:Look, I'm not an idiot. I'm gonna sit across the table, chew my food with my mouth closed, laugh at her jokes, and that's all I'm gonna do. ('sup Vincent Vega)
don't forget the adrenaline shot.
when will she know about the toe infection?
08-12-2005, 11:02 PM
TomFoolery Wrote:She works at the Subway restaurant across the street from the office. She gave me extra turkey on my sub one day and that's how I knew she wanted me.
is this a joke? this broad has a degree and minor and shes slinging turkey sandwhiches in subway?
08-12-2005, 11:16 PM
hoax Wrote:is this a joke? this broad has a degree and minor and shes slinging turkey sandwhiches in subway?
PBA asks me too many questions; my new policy is to never tell her the truth whenever she inquires about something.
BIRD33 Wrote:Im guessing BEW's vag loks like a hotdog that exploded in the microwave.
08-12-2005, 11:27 PM
Anhil8tor Wrote:when was the last time you got laid?
May 2001.
BIRD33 Wrote:Im guessing BEW's vag loks like a hotdog that exploded in the microwave.
08-12-2005, 11:30 PM
TomFoolery Wrote:May 2001.
I am gonna assume that you are treating me under the PBA rule.. I am just curious
08-13-2005, 05:12 AM
TomFoolery Wrote:If SanDog were here he woulda racked my comment. I'm sick of you fuckers not recognizing my $$$ movie quotes.
are you planning to stab a needle filled with synthetic adrenalin in his heart ?
08-13-2005, 05:15 AM
TomFoolery Wrote:She works at the Subway restaurant across the street from the office. She gave me extra turkey on my sub one day and that's how I knew she wanted me.
that's the way you mate in the US, she gives you more food "woman wants strong man you eat, you extra portion of turky.".
08-13-2005, 05:15 AM
CT280 Wrote:don't forget the adrenaline shot.
when will she know about the toe infection?
rack I didn't read your comment before posting mine !
08-13-2005, 06:56 AM
TomFoolery Wrote:Here's what we know:
*Art degree with a minor in Spanish
*Perky breasts (I'd guess 36B)
*Flat stomach
*Very short hair (sucks)
We're probably going to eat somewhere Downtown Milwaukee and then go to the Art Museum. She was impressed that I have a membership there--what she doesn't know is that I won the fucker 2 years ago and only renewed it so I could feel good about donating to charity.
Discuss? Offer advice? Tell me to fuck off?
So let me get this straight, you're going to take out a wide bodied, flat stomached, border crossing liberal to a pizza hurt and then an art museum? And you're doing this out of your own free will? You've just jumped three levels on the loser scale.
At least fuck one of her holes or punch her in the stomach or something. This is fucking pitiful. I'm ashamed to have crossed E-paths with you.
-Spork
Pre-order my book. I've written a bunch of material and we're currently shopping around for a publisher.
-SPorK
08-13-2005, 07:00 AM
Remember to use my line. After dinner and the museum, whisper in her ear, "don't make me turn this rape into a murder." It works everytime. Being a man of the cloth, I would never lie to you. Don't fuck this date up you pussy.
WoolyGoat Wrote:If there's any more room on your nuts, I'd like to grab on. Thanks.
TomFoolery Wrote:Secret Squirrel, I would like to hump you.
08-13-2005, 07:02 AM
cLaY Wrote:hey $$$, don't talk about yourself unless she asks, look her in the eyes and act intrigued with everything she says...and compliment her clothes, hair, eyes, ass, so on...open the door for her, don't act like a dick.
You will be her bestfriend forever. She will tell you her darkest secrets and introduce you to her older, gayer brother.
-Spork
Pre-order my book. I've written a bunch of material and we're currently shopping around for a publisher.
-SPorK
08-13-2005, 07:04 AM
hoax Wrote:is this a joke? this broad has a degree and minor and shes slinging turkey sandwhiches in subway?
Hey cocheese, she has a degee in ART and a minor in SPANISH. She's about made all the career leaps she's going to make.
-Spork
Pre-order my book. I've written a bunch of material and we're currently shopping around for a publisher.
-SPorK
08-13-2005, 05:18 PM
SporK Wrote:Hey cocheese, she has a degee in ART and a minor in SPANISH. She's about made all the career leaps she's going to make.
-Spork
With her spanish minor she may be able to get a job as a coxswain at a blueberry farm.
WoolyGoat Wrote:If there's any more room on your nuts, I'd like to grab on. Thanks.
TomFoolery Wrote:Secret Squirrel, I would like to hump you.
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