[Beau]

I was 17 years old fresh out of High School and one of my friends sister was attending college at Texas A&M and was attending this huge bash during the summer there. So we all load up and get to the party and get completely smashed outta our minds. During the party I decide to go outside and I came up on this big 4 wheel drive beat up pickup. It was unlocked. I get in and decide I am going to steal it and drive it all the 100+ miles back home and take it joy riding on the river by my house. But first I wanted to steal the radio out of it and put it in my car which was a '78 Cadillac Seville parked on the other side of the street at the time. I start trying to take the radio out and find it was much harder than it looked. Needless to say I was unsuccessful in the endeavour. Perhaps I should have been born a brutha I thought as they seem to have a knack for this kind of thing. Anyway I look and sure enough the keys were still in the truck and I put it into gear then crank it and when I do I don't realize this is not an automatic transmisson even though the gear shift is on the steering column. So when I crank it it lunges forward and BAM right into a car parked in front of it. I black out and the next thing I remember I am standing in the street with all these big 300 lbers standing around me getting ready to beat my wormy little butt to a pulp and my friend told me I was stammering "I GOT A CADILLAC, I GOT A CADILLAC I DON'T NEED YOUR BACKWOODS TRASH MOBILE" and that's all I kept saying as they got me outta there all the way back to his sister's house that night. I didn't drive by the way. Those people were trying to get my address for a whole year after that but my friend's sister wouldn't divulge. Man I'm glad I quit drinkin.