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Went to the liquor store and picked up a 750 ml Jim Beam (You know, the plastic traveler). Anyways, with myself being 32 yrs. of age now, my body doesn't seem to handle things of this nature as gracefully as it used to. Well, I was in Rambo mode while looking at the bottle the other night, thinking I'll just man it down straight. I get about half-way through the sumbitch, along with 2 pepcid AC's for the bitchin' heartburn! The wife decides that she is going to bed. I'm sitting up watching TV, and just enjoying the drunk I have going. I decide that I'll go to bed. I lay down, and then comes the point where you know that you have made a big fucking mistake. I run down the 14 steps to the "other" bathroom so the wife doesn't hear her 6'3 husband puking like a teenage boy at his first kegger! To wrap up this little story, I puke so fucking hard that I burst blood vessels in my face and eyelids. I know look as if I had got caught cheating by my wife and she commenced to beating my ass! To make matters worse, the wife keeps asking me if I'm ok, she thinks it is where we went out to eat the night before, and I might have ate something that I was allergic too. I am letting her think that is the case, because I don't want to appear as a pussy!
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I don't know where to begin....
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I do.
HAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAH!!
NinjaBassist Wrote:I thought it would be something different. When I get drunk I usually end up gettin naked and so for the courtesy of the other males in the house I usualy tuck my cock away like a transexual. Mangina ahoy
cLaY Wrote:Bird, less tongue...i want to know you mean it.
Blueeyedwoman
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What's next, West Hollywood?
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I am thinking instead of the 14 steps, you might want to just try 12.
I know what you're thinking now. You think we're all gay, don't you? Think we're all just a bunch of deviant lifestyle-living same-sex having motherfuckers, am I right?
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Woke up this morning, tasting Jim Beam. Holdin' the answer to some oleâ boy's dream,
Got a bad reputation, yes I'm a live wire. I like my Whiskey on ice and my women, on fire.
From memphis to Mobil I've played all the dives, Lord knows I'm lucky just to still be alive.
I'm an all around rebel and I won't be denied with my Whiskey on ice and my women, on fire.
I like my whiskey on ice, my women on fire, I like a good soundin guitar and I won't be called a liar.
Spent many long nights with a burning desire for my whiskey on ice and my women on fire.
Some folks talk about me, yes they always will, they think its been an easy ride and all been down hill.
What they dont think about, what they dont realize, is the shoes that I'm fillin' are a mighty big size.
One night in Nashville I tried to take my life, cause my friends had all left me and so had my wife.
But a fast ride to Florida made me realize, I had some whiskey on ice and some Florida women on fire!
Blueeyedwoman
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I call bullshit. If you said no to Jose tonight, you said yes to Jack.
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