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I know where bruce lee lives - Printable Version

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I know where bruce lee lives - Velvet - 06-19-2004

here

I know where bruce lee lives - CodeWarrior - 06-19-2004

Well his name is Bruce, so by Pythonian logic, since all Australias are named Bruce, he must live in Australia.

Right Bruce?

I know where bruce lee lives - Velvet - 06-20-2004

Ok you busted me .. my name is bruce to :lol:

I know where bruce lee lives - Undeadcannibal - 06-20-2004

Sure, Bruce. And all Russians are named Yakov, right? and americans are all John, and canadians are all named Buck. I see where tis is going.

I know where bruce lee lives - Velvet - 06-20-2004

Ok john what ever you say :p

I know where bruce lee lives - Undeadcannibal - 06-20-2004

It's pretty sad how many Johns there are in the US.

I know where bruce lee lives - Velvet - 06-20-2004

it could be worse undead .. you could be called bill or george :lol:

I know where bruce lee lives - Undeadcannibal - 06-20-2004

yikes. I know a guy named will, but I call him Billiam. and he hates it, but I don't care.

I know where bruce lee lives - Velvet - 06-20-2004

:lmaoAngry billiam .. thats a good one Big Grin

I know where bruce lee lives - Suicide Jim - 06-20-2004

the guys a prick so he deserves what ever pot shots are aimed at him.

I know where bruce lee lives - Velvet - 06-21-2004

Ohh .. you know billiam as well jim ... if he is so bad why do yous even talk to him ?

I know where bruce lee lives - leucetios - 06-21-2004

I probably got this a little wrong:

Quote:Bruce 1
G'day, Bruce!

Bruce II
Oh, Hello Bruce!

Bruce 1
How are you Bruce?

Bruce II
A bit crooked, Bruce.

Bruce I
Where's Bruce?

Bruce II
He's not 'ere, Bruce.

Bruce I
Blimey, it's hot in here, Bruce.

Bruce II
Hot enough to boil a monkey's bum!

Bruce I
That's a strange expression, Bruce.

Bruce II
Well Bruce, I heard the Prime Minister use it. "It's hot enough to boil  a monkey's bum in here, your Majesty," he said and she smiled quietly to herself.

Bruce I
She's a good Sheila Bruce, and not at all stuck up.

Bruce II
Here! Here's the boss-fellow now!

Bruce I
'Ow  are you, Bruce?

Bruce II
G'day Bruce!

Bruce III
Hello Bruce.
G'day Bruce.
Gentleman, I'd like to introduce man from Pommeyland who is joinin'  us this year in the philosophy department at the University of  Walamaloo.


(Everyone) G'day!

Mike
Hello.

Bruce III
Michael Baldwin, Bruce. Michael Baldwin, Bruce. Michael Baldwin, Bruce.

Bruce I
Is your name not Bruce?

Mike:
No, it's Michael.

Bruce II
That's going to cause a little confusion.

Bruce I
Mind if we call you "Bruce" to keep it clear?

Bruce III
Gentlemen, I think we better start the faculty meeting. Before we start,  though, I'd like to ask the padre for a prayer.

Bruce I
Oh Lord, we beseech Thee, Amen!!

Everyone
Amen!

Crack two! (Bottles opening)

Bruce III
Now I call upon Bruce to officially welcome Mr. Baldwin to the philosophy faculty.

Bruce II
I'd like to welcome the pommey bastard to God's own Earth, and remind  him that we don't like stuck-up sticky-bates here.

(Everyone) Hear, hear! Well spoken, Bruce!

Bruce I
Bruce here teaches classical philosophy, Bruce there teaches Haegelian philosophy, and Bruce here teaches logical positivism. And is also  in charge of the sheep dip.

Bruce II
What's New-Bruce going to teach?

Bruce III
New-Bruce will be teaching political science, Machiavelli, Benton,  Lockholm, Sackly, Millbo, Hasset, and Bernerd.

Bruce I
Those are all cricketers!

(Everyone) Australia, Australia, Australia, Australia, we love you
    amen!

Bruce II
Another two! (Bottles opening)

Mike
Any questions?

Bruce I
New-Bruce, are you a Poofter?

Bruce II
Are you a Poofter?

New Bruce
No!

Bruce I
No. Right, I just want to remind you of the faculty rules:


  Rule One! (Everyone) No Poofters!
  Rule Two, no member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abbos in any way at all -- if there's anybody watching.
  Rule Three? (Everyone) No Poofters!!
  Rule Four, now this term, I don't want to catch anybody not drinking.
  Rule Five, (Everyone) No Poofters!
  Rule Six, there is NO ... Rule Six.
  Rule Seven, (Everyone) No Poofters!!
  Right, that concludes the readin' of the rules, Bruce.

Bruce III
This here's the wattle, the emblem of our land. You can stick it in  a bottle, you can hold it in your hand. Amen!


*singing*
Immanuel Kant was a real piss-ant who was very rarely stable.
Heideggar, Heideggar was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table.
David Hume could out-consume Schoppenhauer and Hegel.
And Whittgenstein was a beery swine who was just as sloshed as Schlegel.
There's nothing Nieizsche couldn't teach 'ya 'bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.
John Stewart Mill, of his own free will, after half a pint of shanty was particularly ill.
Plato, they say, could stick it away, 'alf a crate of whiskey every day!
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
And Hobbes was fond of his Dram.
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart:
"I drink, therefore I am."
Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed;
A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed.


I know where bruce lee lives - Beaucephus - 06-21-2004

Man a couple of good hits of acid and I could play on that damn thing for hours.