Straws - Printable Version

Straws - Printable Version

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Straws - Oli-dogg - 11-29-2006

When I was paying for petrol today this guy in front of me at the check-out was stressing out big time because he bought a chocolate milk and there were no straws left. I thought he was going to start crying. This made me come to the realisation that only fags use straws. I don't know if it's the whole sucking action or whether it's part of the code of conduct of being a homo.
SporK? HotBonerAssReam?

Anyway, when I was a lot younger I went through a stage where I was tired of drinking bourbon so I switched to Kaluah and some of those other alcoholic milk drinks. This only lasted a few months but whenever I ordered Kaluah and milk from the bar they would put a straw in my glass. My girlfriend at the time was drinking Scotch but the straw was only ever served in my glass - I had to pull the straw out, drain the milk off it and dump it in her glass before returning to our table. After a while I came to the conclusion that Kaluah and milk was a girly drink and the bar staff probably thought the Scotch and coke was mine.

To my own credit, even at that low point in my life where I was leaning towards faggy drinks I still wasn't gay enough to use a straw. Luckily my taste buds have changed and I only drink beer now, or Oli-dogg could have been a bigger homo than Major Private!

I bet 90% of the IT'ers reading this thread are straw-users. Don't be afraid to admit it. Today is 'Be nice to a homo' day so no-one is going to hurt you *.

[SIZE="1"]* This amnesty ends at midnight. Oli-dogg can not guarantee your safety after this period. Fags reply to this post at their own risk.[/SIZE]

Straws - what? - 11-29-2006

posted: 11-28-2006, 08:05 PM
Last edited by Oli-dogg : 11-29-2006 at 01:31 AM.

you spent 5 and a half hours getting this post just right? this after spending years rationalizing that, even though you displayed some pretty heavy homosexual behavior during a "low point" in your youth, you're not queer 'cause you don't use a straw? you're one of those self-hating kinda faggots, aren't ya?

also, scotch should not be mixed with coca-cola. unless you're a fag hag I guess.

Straws - snarg - 11-29-2006

zing

Straws - Oli-dogg - 11-30-2006

what? Wrote:you spent 5 and a half hours getting this post just right?

Actually, after 5 and a half hours with no replies I toned down the warning at the bottom in case it was scaring you fags away. Congratulations! You're a braver homo than I thought.

Straws - Oli-dogg - 11-30-2006

[Image: teethman.jpg]

Despite being a straw-user from way back, what? swears he's not gay.

Straws - BIRD33 - 11-30-2006

Vodka on the rocks usually comes with a straw.It's used to stir.Get some more drinking experience.

Straws - Oli-dogg - 11-30-2006

BIRD33 Wrote:Vodka on the rocks usually comes with a straw.It's used to stir.Get some more drinking experience.

Oli-dogg likes to stir.

Sorry Slurpee-boy, but do you expect me to believe you stir and don't suck?

Straws - ntype - 11-30-2006

BIRD33 Wrote:Vodka on the rocks usually comes with a straw.It's used to stir.Get some more drinking experience.

he's an aussie his standarts of classy may be a beer served with a napkin by a tenant who didn't smell like he slept in the trashcan

Straws - Oli-dogg - 11-30-2006

ntype Wrote:he's an aussie his standarts of classy may be a beer served with a napkin by a tenant who didn't smell like he slept in the trashcan

My standarts are high but my ntypedarts hit the target. You don't want me throwing them at your monkey-ass so go climb the Alps until you suffer hypoxia. Thanks.

Oh, and don't forget to take your straw so you can suck up the snow when you run out of drinking water.

Straws - what? - 11-30-2006

Oli-dogg Wrote:Actually, after 5 and a half hours with no replies I toned down the warning at the bottom in case it was scaring you fags away. Congratulations! You're a braver homo than I thought.

if I were the kind to point this type of thing out, I'd ask you how often you thought about what kind of homo I am

Oli-dogg Wrote:

Despite being a straw-user from way back, what? swears he's not gay.

they did have a "brown gums" fixer tool on my photo software, so I didn't bother with the red eye remover either. link me to a single post where I've sworn I wasn't gay

Straws - Oli-dogg - 12-01-2006

what? Wrote:link me to a single post where I've sworn I wasn't gay

My mistake, your closet door is wide open.

Straws - HotBonerAssReam - 12-01-2006

Oli-dogg Wrote:My mistake, your closet door is wide open.

So straws are gay but YMP's cock pumping in and out of OliDoggs ass isn't?

You're threads are the worst ever, cockfucker.

Straws - Oli-dogg - 12-01-2006

HotBonerAssReam Wrote:So straws are gay but YMP's cock pumping in and out of OliDoggs ass isn't?

You're threads are the worst ever, cockfucker.

Hello my fan. Are you still a little upset with the new title? I could be on the receiving end of anal sex while sucking on a whole pack of straws and still not match you in gayness.

As IT’s number one faggot you deserve more recognition. Leeman why isn’t there a crown in the gift shop for HotBonerAssReam? This homo trully deserves it.

Straws - what? - 12-01-2006

Oli-dogg Wrote:Hello my fan. Are you still a little upset with the new title? I could be on the receiving end of anal sex while sucking on a whole pack of straws and still not match you in gayness.

As ITâs number one faggot you deserve more recognition. Leeman why isnât there a crown in the gift shop for HotBonerAssReam? This homo trully deserves it.

I think it's great that you went from telling us how manly you are because you don't drink out of straws to contemplating getting buttslammed. quite a transformation in one day

Straws - Oli-dogg - 12-02-2006

what? Wrote:I think it's great that you went from telling us how manly you are because you don't drink out of straws to contemplating getting buttslammed. quite a transformation in one day

Maybe, but I wouldn't get close to this guys title. All hope is lost. I'll just have to stay straight and leave you poo punchers to what you do best. Sorry HotBoner, I tried.